DEAR ABBY: My dear friend “Rose”’s husband died five years ago, and she struggled with grief and loneliness. She immersed herself in her church, friends and family. We usually talked three to five times a week and traveled together.
Rose decided to explore online dating. She met a man and her life changed completely. She has become totally involved, dependent, isolated and controlled.
He wants nothing to do with any of his family, friends, or church relatives. Rose has ceased all communication with the others. Within two months she bought a life insurance policy, moved in with him and sold her house.
No one knows your address or contact information. He has deleted his friends from Facebook and has stopped communicating with his family.
I think I’d say he’s happy. In the meantime, we are left saddened, shocked and angry. Should we just accept their lifestyle choice and move on?
PUZZLED IN IOWA
DEAR PUZZLED: Your friend seems to have gotten involved with a man who is more than a little controlling. That she buys a life insurance policy, sells her house (!), and moves in with him in the space of two months is, frankly, shocking.
However, with that said, Rose is an adult and has the right to make her own decisions, though it would have been infinitely better if a lawyer or other trusted advisor had handled this scenario before stepping in to the extent that she has. If it’s any comfort to you, even though she no longer has her contact information, I’m sure she knows how to reach you and her family if she feels the need.
DEAR ABBY: I have been divorced for 18 years. My sister is also divorced. Recently, she has been dating my ex.
He picks her up at our parents’ house, where she has been living. When I’m there, I have to see this.
My parents don’t tell her about it, and I don’t know why. When she was married to him, they always told me they didn’t like me. So now that his other daughter is associated with him, are they keeping quiet?
This bothers me so much that I don’t talk to him anymore. I feel like she has stabbed me in the back and she only cares about herself.
How can I get over this? haunts me I need your opinion. Can you help?
PAIN IN NEW JERSEY
DEAR PAIN: Almost two decades have passed since you and your ex-husband parted ways. Surely your family has been aware of the reasons for this. That your sister exercises such poor judgment that she gets involved with him is sad.
While I understand why you’re less than thrilled about this, rest assured that your sister will learn her lesson sooner or later. One way to overcome this would be to spend less time at your parents’ house and make an appointment with a psychotherapist to help you deal with your grief.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, aka Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
Source: news.google.com